A few quotes that I found fun and interesting, and a short rewrite of a scene from The Lion King...
Puritanism - The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy. -- H. L. Mencken, "A Mencken Chrestomathy"
__________
People think the information superhighway is fast, but nothing travels faster than word on the street. -- Mark Williams (Richmond, VA, homicide detective), "Crime 360," April 24, 2008
__________
Heroism, the Caucasian mountaineers say, is endurance for one moment more. -- George F. Kenna, letter (1921)
__________
Simba - "But don't we EAT zebras?"
Mufasa - "Yes, son, but it really doesn't hurt them when we chase them down and pounce on them, when we slash and bite at their hindquarters until they collapse, or even when we grab their throats in our jaws to smother them slowly while other members of the pride rip open their bellies and start feeding on them before they're completely dead. Good God, Son, it isn't like we execute them with a high-powered rifle or something!"
(Originally written in response to a comment about "the cruelty of hunting." I long ago lost my taste for hunting, though I still enjoy shooting. There are people who hunt for reasons that I think are unhealthy, or in ways that I think are unwise. But in general I have no issue with hunters or their chosen sport.)
Friday, May 30, 2008
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Writer's block...?
There are two things that frustrate me as a writer - having nothing to say, and having too much to say. I haven't posted for a while because everything I want to say is log-jammed in my head and can't reach my fingers to eventually become electrons in cyberspace and photons on your computer monitor.
I turned 51 without a keystroke to mark the milestone. No new tattoo, either, in case anyone's wondering. But on the bright side, my daughter and her nice husband sent me a gift of cash that went right into the tattoo fund! My coworkers gave me a fun card that showed all kinds of delightfully strange creatures celebrating, birthday-style. Chris labelled it, "Party in Mike's head!" Apparently he "gets" me.
Speaking of my head and the psycho-village (as Ed Chinn calls it) inside, they've started a church in there that I should write about sometime. Three-Fingers is playing some fun stuff on his upside-down guitar (maybe someday I'll tell you that story) that folks really should hear.
Now that I've brought up music, I'm listening to the album, Inquisition Symphony, by Apocalyptica. If you don't know them, run a YouTube search and watch and listen! The Metallica covers are really cool, but I like the original music just as well - Inquisition Symphony contains some of each. I like them better without the drummer, and much better without the (fortunately rare!) vocals.
And finally (for now), I've been thinking a lot about a sermon I heard on dealing with loneliness. Sort of a set of tactics for winning a one-on-one struggle with loneliness. More on this another time - but really, if we're thinking in terms of "one man versus loneliness," haven't we already admitted defeat?
I turned 51 without a keystroke to mark the milestone. No new tattoo, either, in case anyone's wondering. But on the bright side, my daughter and her nice husband sent me a gift of cash that went right into the tattoo fund! My coworkers gave me a fun card that showed all kinds of delightfully strange creatures celebrating, birthday-style. Chris labelled it, "Party in Mike's head!" Apparently he "gets" me.
Speaking of my head and the psycho-village (as Ed Chinn calls it) inside, they've started a church in there that I should write about sometime. Three-Fingers is playing some fun stuff on his upside-down guitar (maybe someday I'll tell you that story) that folks really should hear.
Now that I've brought up music, I'm listening to the album, Inquisition Symphony, by Apocalyptica. If you don't know them, run a YouTube search and watch and listen! The Metallica covers are really cool, but I like the original music just as well - Inquisition Symphony contains some of each. I like them better without the drummer, and much better without the (fortunately rare!) vocals.
And finally (for now), I've been thinking a lot about a sermon I heard on dealing with loneliness. Sort of a set of tactics for winning a one-on-one struggle with loneliness. More on this another time - but really, if we're thinking in terms of "one man versus loneliness," haven't we already admitted defeat?
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
There are 10 kinds of people in the world...
...those who understand binaries and those who don't.
This morning, on our walk, Pam and I discussed the fact that some people kick rocks out of the landscaping and onto the sidewalk, while others kick them back. Sort of a yin/yang relationship that gives everyone something to do when they're out walking, I guess.
But it would be too restrictive to say that there are two kinds of people in the world - those who kick rocks onto the sidewalk, and those that kick them back again. Actually, there are also those who ignore the rocks altogether.
Which one am I? I'm the one straightening up the world one rock at a time.
This morning, on our walk, Pam and I discussed the fact that some people kick rocks out of the landscaping and onto the sidewalk, while others kick them back. Sort of a yin/yang relationship that gives everyone something to do when they're out walking, I guess.
But it would be too restrictive to say that there are two kinds of people in the world - those who kick rocks onto the sidewalk, and those that kick them back again. Actually, there are also those who ignore the rocks altogether.
Which one am I? I'm the one straightening up the world one rock at a time.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Sheep May Safely Graze...or maybe not
The sheep are starving - sacred cows have eaten all the grass.
Monday, May 5, 2008
By the Numbers
I imagine that almost everyone knows what a "paint-by-number" is. Many of us have probably tried our hands at one; maybe we've even finished one. Or more. If we dutifully follow the instructions and carefully abide by the diagram and diligently paint within the lines, we can produce a pretty exact copy of the illustration on the box. If we take some liberties with the boundaries, we can turn out a somewhat-individualized version.
Is it best to "stay inside the lines" or should we dare to defy convention? The more individualized painting might better appeal to our sense of beauty. But maybe the creators of the product intended for it to look as closely identical to the box cover as possible. OK, probably not. The creators of the product intended for you to buy it - nothing more, nothing less. Once they have your money, they really don't care whether your finished painting looks like a tall ship in the sunset or a bowl of nachos.
I think that sometimes we live by numbers. Weight, cholesterol count, caloric intake, blood sugar, vitamin dosages, and on and on and on... OK, I get that sometimes we have to track these numbers. Sudden changes in weight, for instance, might indicate serious illness. Extremes in weight are practically illnesses in and of themselves. Blood sugar levels that are too high or too low are dangerous and possibly indicative of other problems. For some people, tracking certain health-related numbers is not so much a way of live as it is a condition of survival.
But for the rest (the majority) of us, the only reason we watch our weight and the umpteen other "health-related" numbers in our lives is that someone has told us to do so. Whether it's the latest "medical" breakthrough, or a long-term government "study," or a new "diet" book, or some "you can do it" type of TV show, someone is selling us a "live-by-numbers" kit. And for the most part, they don't really care what the finished product looks like - they've succeeded once we buy the box.
Several people have asked me lately if I'm losing weight. I've made some adjustments to the way I eat and I'm exercising 3-5 days a week. The "live-by-numbers" kit would tell me that I'd better be losing weight. And if I'm not, then I might need to count calories more closely, or adjust the number of grams of this or that, or...
Well, the truth is, I lost about 5 pounds over the course of about 6 months as a result of changing my diet, before I added any exercise. Since adding exercise about 6 months ago, I've lost another 6-8 pounds, depending upon what day I weigh. That could be discouraging, because I'm working hard. But I only check my weight out of curiosity. I'm not living by the weight numbers. I'm instead enjoying the fact that my pants fit more loosely around my waist and my shirts fit more snugly on my chest and shoulders.
I come from a "cholesterally"-gifted bloodline. My father and my two siblings take medication to regulate their cholesterol levels. My doctor checks mine every year, of course. And it hovers right around 209. I'm not worried that it's over 200, the old standard, nor even that it's over 180, which some "experts" are clamoring about as the newer, better standard.
Instead, I have chosen to follow Michael Pollan's advice in In Defense of Food - "Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants." I've added 45 minutes or more of exercise several times a week, including walking and weightlifting. To me this seems to be a common-sense, healthy way to live. Sort of the way people lived before food became an industrial product. Or at least a sincere attempt to mimic that lifestyle, given the food choices available to me and the lack of physical work required at my job. It's something like the way people live in other parts of the world where the American diet hasn't yet insinuated itself. The way people live who've never heard of ailments like heart disease, diabetes, obesity and tooth decay.
I don't worry too much about weight, cholesterol numbers, calorie intake vs. calorie use, and so on. And while I'm not entirely "number-free," I've definitely chosen not to buy the "kit."
Is it best to "stay inside the lines" or should we dare to defy convention? The more individualized painting might better appeal to our sense of beauty. But maybe the creators of the product intended for it to look as closely identical to the box cover as possible. OK, probably not. The creators of the product intended for you to buy it - nothing more, nothing less. Once they have your money, they really don't care whether your finished painting looks like a tall ship in the sunset or a bowl of nachos.
I think that sometimes we live by numbers. Weight, cholesterol count, caloric intake, blood sugar, vitamin dosages, and on and on and on... OK, I get that sometimes we have to track these numbers. Sudden changes in weight, for instance, might indicate serious illness. Extremes in weight are practically illnesses in and of themselves. Blood sugar levels that are too high or too low are dangerous and possibly indicative of other problems. For some people, tracking certain health-related numbers is not so much a way of live as it is a condition of survival.
But for the rest (the majority) of us, the only reason we watch our weight and the umpteen other "health-related" numbers in our lives is that someone has told us to do so. Whether it's the latest "medical" breakthrough, or a long-term government "study," or a new "diet" book, or some "you can do it" type of TV show, someone is selling us a "live-by-numbers" kit. And for the most part, they don't really care what the finished product looks like - they've succeeded once we buy the box.
Several people have asked me lately if I'm losing weight. I've made some adjustments to the way I eat and I'm exercising 3-5 days a week. The "live-by-numbers" kit would tell me that I'd better be losing weight. And if I'm not, then I might need to count calories more closely, or adjust the number of grams of this or that, or...
Well, the truth is, I lost about 5 pounds over the course of about 6 months as a result of changing my diet, before I added any exercise. Since adding exercise about 6 months ago, I've lost another 6-8 pounds, depending upon what day I weigh. That could be discouraging, because I'm working hard. But I only check my weight out of curiosity. I'm not living by the weight numbers. I'm instead enjoying the fact that my pants fit more loosely around my waist and my shirts fit more snugly on my chest and shoulders.
I come from a "cholesterally"-gifted bloodline. My father and my two siblings take medication to regulate their cholesterol levels. My doctor checks mine every year, of course. And it hovers right around 209. I'm not worried that it's over 200, the old standard, nor even that it's over 180, which some "experts" are clamoring about as the newer, better standard.
Instead, I have chosen to follow Michael Pollan's advice in In Defense of Food - "Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants." I've added 45 minutes or more of exercise several times a week, including walking and weightlifting. To me this seems to be a common-sense, healthy way to live. Sort of the way people lived before food became an industrial product. Or at least a sincere attempt to mimic that lifestyle, given the food choices available to me and the lack of physical work required at my job. It's something like the way people live in other parts of the world where the American diet hasn't yet insinuated itself. The way people live who've never heard of ailments like heart disease, diabetes, obesity and tooth decay.
I don't worry too much about weight, cholesterol numbers, calorie intake vs. calorie use, and so on. And while I'm not entirely "number-free," I've definitely chosen not to buy the "kit."
Friday, May 2, 2008
They're all alike...
I think the title of this post is probably my favorite line I've ever written. Now, I don't claim to have coined the phrase, but there was one time, in seventh grade, when I put it to particularly good use. At least, I think so!
The assignment was to write a story describing something. I was already well-unhinged (or imaginative, if you're of a kinder bent) by the age of twelve; it took only a moment for me to reject an opening line like, "My dog is brown and..."
Instead I described a snowstorm in the first person, from the point-of-view of one snowflake preparing to leap bravely from the clouds. He was part of an invading army of paratroopers mounting an assault upon a particular red-leaf maple tree. I recorded his thoughts and experiences - from the seconds preceding his jump, to his jubilation upon actually landing on the target tree, and ending with his inevitable cry, "I'm mellll....!" Somewhere between leap and landing he was jostled by another descending snowflake.
"They're all alike," he declared indignantly.
I loved that line so very much, but I was afraid that the rest of the class wouldn't catch the irony, so the final version read, "Snowflakes are all supposed to be different, but they're all alike." I never liked that adaptation as much, but it's what I submitted. It felt like I spoiled a good joke by clumsily explaining the punch line.
To this day I am plagued by two questions:
1) Should I have trusted my first thought and left the line the way I liked it best?
2) Why the heck do I still worry about question No. 1?
The assignment was to write a story describing something. I was already well-unhinged (or imaginative, if you're of a kinder bent) by the age of twelve; it took only a moment for me to reject an opening line like, "My dog is brown and..."
Instead I described a snowstorm in the first person, from the point-of-view of one snowflake preparing to leap bravely from the clouds. He was part of an invading army of paratroopers mounting an assault upon a particular red-leaf maple tree. I recorded his thoughts and experiences - from the seconds preceding his jump, to his jubilation upon actually landing on the target tree, and ending with his inevitable cry, "I'm mellll....!" Somewhere between leap and landing he was jostled by another descending snowflake.
"They're all alike," he declared indignantly.
I loved that line so very much, but I was afraid that the rest of the class wouldn't catch the irony, so the final version read, "Snowflakes are all supposed to be different, but they're all alike." I never liked that adaptation as much, but it's what I submitted. It felt like I spoiled a good joke by clumsily explaining the punch line.
To this day I am plagued by two questions:
1) Should I have trusted my first thought and left the line the way I liked it best?
2) Why the heck do I still worry about question No. 1?
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Go, D-Backs!
It's the bottom of the sixth, with the home team down by two runs, a man on base, and the pitcher's spot up. Time for a pinch-hitter. In his second year of big-league play, the youngster stepping out of the dugout stands 6'5", weighs around 220 pounds and boasts a career batting average of .350 or so (over .400 this season), with 4 career homers to his credit. People still talk about the game last season when he went 4 for 5. Two home runs and a double. 6 RBIs and 4 runs scored.
The opposing manager opts for a pitching change to face this powerhouse. The duel begins, and it doesn't end well for the visitors. The little white ball suffers a fearsome knock and sails over the right-field fence. Two runs score and the game is tied. Unquestionably this is the play of the game, even more dramatic than the winning run scored later.
Why is the game-tying, pinch-hit homer a bigger deal for a guy batting over .400, with only 5 starts and 4 pinch-hit appearances, than the winning run for an everyday player batting .267 (career and season)? Maybe it's the other set of stats the pinch-hitter is racking up. Like an ERA of 3.48 so far this season, and a win-loss record of 4-0 (4.17 and 12-8, lifetime).
Yup, Micah Owings is a junior member of the Arizona Diamondbacks' starting rotation. And so far it looks like he knows how to win games - no matter whether he's standing 60 feet in front of home plate, or right next to it.
So far, it's a fun year to be a D-Backs fan!
The opposing manager opts for a pitching change to face this powerhouse. The duel begins, and it doesn't end well for the visitors. The little white ball suffers a fearsome knock and sails over the right-field fence. Two runs score and the game is tied. Unquestionably this is the play of the game, even more dramatic than the winning run scored later.
Why is the game-tying, pinch-hit homer a bigger deal for a guy batting over .400, with only 5 starts and 4 pinch-hit appearances, than the winning run for an everyday player batting .267 (career and season)? Maybe it's the other set of stats the pinch-hitter is racking up. Like an ERA of 3.48 so far this season, and a win-loss record of 4-0 (4.17 and 12-8, lifetime).
Yup, Micah Owings is a junior member of the Arizona Diamondbacks' starting rotation. And so far it looks like he knows how to win games - no matter whether he's standing 60 feet in front of home plate, or right next to it.
So far, it's a fun year to be a D-Backs fan!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
