Fried-News-Day

In fossil news:

Fossil of female's pelvis found in Ethiopia
by Anne Ryman - Nov. 14, 2008 12:00 AM The Arizona Republic

The story contains this observation:

Because researchers lacked a female pelvis, they had to make certain assumptions about the female anatomy based on the Turkana boy fossil.

Apparently researchers with a female pelvis do a better job in paleoanthropolgy than those without. Clearly this is a job where possession of male anatomy is not advantageous. Is there corrective surgery to give men a female pelvis so they can compete?
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In martial arts news:

Samurai swordsman surrenders peacefully
by Parker Leavitt - Nov. 12, 2008 01:12 PM The Arizona Republic

Police arrested a 39-year-old man who reportedly used a samurai sword to assault another man Tuesday in a northwest Phoenix neighborhood. There were no injuries.

Middleage mutant ninjacompoop...
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From the wild side:

Man arrives at bar with pet alligator; cops called
Nov. 14, 2008 09:20 AM Associated Press
HUNTINGTON BEACH, Calif. - Heard the one about the guy who walked into a bar with an alligator?
At Johnny's Saloon in Orange County, it was more than a joke early Saturday when a man arrived with his 3-foot pet gator on a leash.

OK, OK, so this guy walks into a bar. Just about knocks himself out. His alligator, however, walks right under it, unscathed.

Moral of the story? I don't really know any funny alligator-in-bar jokes...
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And finally, new from Obamania and bad puns:

Nov. 12, 2008 03:55 PM Associated Press reports that a team of researchers has created carbon nanotube images of Obama that can be seen only through electron microscopes.

The article carried this headline:

'Nanobama' makes Obama's likeness microscopic

Now, if someone creates an image of him on a banana, we might see this headline:

'Bananobama' makes Obama's likeness appetizing when split in half and placed on either side of several scoops of ice cream.