The Inside Gospel

Well, the church changed their sign again.  Eastbound traffic sees:

Try Jesus.  If you don't like him, the devil will always take you back.

Westbound traffic sees the schedule of services.  Perhaps someone expects that upon reading eastbound, passers-by will be grasped by the implacable claws of conviction.  And so, by the time they pass the sign again, in the other direction, they will want to know when they can gather into the loving arms of this  fellowship.  Or maybe there is nothing intentional about this arrangement.

Either way, I saw no extra cars in the nearly-empty parking lot.  No throngs of lost souls on their knees before the great sign, pouring out their heart-wrenched pleas for just one more chance to try Jesus.  No vows of lifelong loyalty no matter how badly the devil may want them back.

No, it was just another day of the week.  Lines of cars sped past, apparently leaving behind an untried Jesus.  Barreling into the welcoming clutches of a waiting and willing devil.

And why should anyone "try Jesus?"  That sign is not about bringing people into the church.  It has nothing to do with offering Living Water to thirsty souls.  It's not even a real attempt to convince someone to "try Jesus."  It's nothing more than an inside joke that makes church "insiders" laugh at the expense of church "outsiders."  It's just another barely-humorous and marginally-creative attempt to look hip, current, witty, and "evangelical."  But the only people who get the joke are the ones who already have given Jesus a try.  Only those whose hearts are adamant against the devil's clutching desires can see the remarkable wit in the sign's admonition.

And so it is with a lot of the crap that we try to pass off as "the Gospel."  Bad inside jokes, and phrases that are only catchy if you've already caught the disease they're passing.  "Pray this prayer" and you'll be "saved."  Tell me when you prayed the prayer, so I can know how long you've "been saved."  Pray the prayer here, in this place, so that when you're "saved," we can claim you as one of "ours."  Now, go tell everyone else to pray the prayer so they can be "saved," too.  And be sure to bring them here, so we can make them "ours," too.

And when they're "saved," they'll look, think, and act just like all of us, because we're what "saved," people look like!  In fact, that's how we know when someone really means the prayer - being "saved" makes them just like us!

You know, the ones who think, "Try Jesus. If you don't like him, the devil will always take you back," is funny, creative, and evangelical.

God forgive his Bride for reducing her wedding invitation, written in God's own blood on shredded flesh, to the words, "Try Jesus" in moveable letters stuck on a lighted sign.  For exchanging God's richest feast for a pitiful bit of tasteless bread and a tiny sip of reconstituted grape juice.  For worshiping our theologies instead of falling helplessly on our faces in the life-threatening presence of Theos and Logos.